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[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

Why can't I be Dorothy and whipped away to a world where there's no tornado?

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[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

Everything else he knows what as farce. Now he has to learn about the real me, and I don't think he's going to like me very much. I don't even like me.

[breaksniceguys.livejournal.com]

I like you just fine, but I have the wrong body parts. He's going to like you, and he'll like even more that you're honest.

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

If I don't make it to Jacksonville, you know he's dumped me on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere.

[breaksniceguys.livejournal.com]

Then at least grab your cell and call me for help.

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

I'm hoping the fact he loves me will give me a bit of a leg up to at least get through the full trip.

[breaksniceguys.livejournal.com]

I'll keep my fingers crossed, but call if you need anything. I will make up for being a shitty hag right now.

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

I don't know what I need. It's like my brain has spontaneously combusted. I went to his place at 3am in the pouring rain with no coat or umbrella. It was like a scene out of a bad romantic comedy.

[breaksniceguys.livejournal.com]

Or a scene out of the most amazing moment of your life. I still have yet to have a rain kiss. I feel denied.

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

No, it wasn't really on that level. It took all my guts to tell him I was sick and then trying not to pass out. Cuddling in his bed was the best bit.

[breaksniceguys.livejournal.com]

So this guy really does mean the world to you?

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

I still don't know why he wants me, but he's the most amazing person I've ever met. He's just... beautiful. In every way. I don't deserve him.

[breaksniceguys.livejournal.com]

Can I... Is it okay if I talk to him myself? You do deserve him, Kurt. You deserve the world. But you've been knocked back so many times you've started to believe that you don't.

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

You want to talk to Blaine? Not if you're going to tell him the trip will be like a journey to hell!

I need help.

[breaksniceguys.livejournal.com]

Cross my heart, I won't say anything like that! I just haven't met him yet. Or talked to him. Are you ashamed of me as your hag?

It's a huge thing for you to admit that. It's why I'm proud of you.

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

Why would I be ashamed of you? You just... haven't seem interested in him until now. And you want to talk to him.

I thought I had control, but I don't. And I hurt Blaine because of it. I should have told him.

[breaksniceguys.livejournal.com]

What are you talking about? Of course I'm interested. But I can't deny that I've been a really shitty hag lately. And I'm sorry, Kurt. I really am.

You thought you were protecting him. Sometimes we wind up doing the wrong thing in the name of protecting the ones we love.

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

I've hardly spoken to you, that's all.

Who would want to deal with this? No one. I thought I could get it under control and then it wouldn't matter anyway. But it just... made it all worse. I just got sicker.

[breaksniceguys.livejournal.com]

I know, I'm trying to fix that. Can I see you and Blaine before you go?

Someone who knows why you're special. That's who. You need to remember it's okay to not have the strength to do it all yourself. You have support. Always.

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

I have to be there before five this afternoon or I lose the bed. He's on his way over now.

I thought he might make me better. I know that sounds deluded, but I thought if someone liked me, I would just have this miraculous reason to get better. But I just got worse. Everything became amplified.

[breaksniceguys.livejournal.com]

Okay, well, I'll meet you both there. I won't hold you up for too long I promise. I wouldn't want you to lose the bed.

You're going through a huge moment in your life, Kurt. It's okay to not have the miracle cure. It doesn't mean Blaine's bad for you. It means you're experiencing something you never thought you would and there's always pressure that comes with it. But you know enough now to ask for help and that's a step all of its own.

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

I don't trust myself for another night out here. Blaine will give me a reason to at least stay in control if he's with me.

He's amazing. I never expected anything like that. He's the sort of person that happens to other people, and not me, you know? His heart is... it should be illegal how open it is.

[breaksniceguys.livejournal.com]

Sweetheart, it's happened to you and I couldn't be happier. You've found this amazing short dark and handsome guy that's got you feeling love. I adore him for that alone, but I will still wear his balls as earrings if he ever purposely hurts you.

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

I don't think he knows how to purposely hurt anyway. I mean, he even adopted Noah Puckerman.

[breaksniceguys.livejournal.com]

Now that is a hell of an achievement.