"Dirty little secret, don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret."

[justbeingaqueen]

Who: Kurt Hummel, Mercedes Jones and Quinn Fabray
What: Bitches calling bitches out
Where: Their new shared home
When: About two after Quinn's surprise

The past week had been absolutely crazy for everyone. They had finally found a beach house to move into, perfect size for the five of them to share and still have their personal space. Mercedes, Puck, and Quinn had their own rooms, whilst Blaine and Kurt had nabbed the master bedroom with the en-suite. It was one of the clauses Kurt insisted on with the shared house, just like he had when he had originally moved in with the girls years ago. They had been there officially for four nights now, but things were still in disarray as they got settled. Kurt had ensured he was completely unpacked, even skipping sleep (though Blaine didn't let him skip meals) to get it done because he hadn't been able to settle without things out of place. It was just his condition coming through and they all understood and just left him to it. But not everyone had been as anal as he was and they all still had boxes piled up around the place.

Well, other than Quinn, who had finished hers the evening before. But now, she had just had a complete bitchy meltdown to Kurt and Mercedes because she had kicked her toe on one of Blaine's boxes that were piled in front of Puck's boxes in the hall. And because it was Blaine, for some reason, Quinn had irrationally snapped at Kurt by default. Blaine, who was passed out in their bedroom upstairs with a bad migraine he had woken up in the middle of the night with. Of course, Kurt was never one to just take a bitch-out lying down, and as soon as she had finished her little rant that had even Mercedes stopping mid-sweeping of the floor to plant her hands defensively on her hips, Kurt afforded her an epic bitch glare of his own.

"Did you seriously just call my boyfriend a messy pain in the ass, you bitch?!" he demanded, giving her an angry point. "He's not exactly in any condition to be unpacking any boxes, and Puck has been working nightshift all week! You're going to just have to put up with it until they want to get to it! I don't know what the hell has gotten into you lately, but you better get that stick out of your ass ASAP or we'll all be on the phone to our landlord quicker than you can say 'messy hobbit' to get your name off the lease! You have been insufferable for days now and I'd rather tape you inside one of these boxes right now than deal with it!" There was even a sassy gay head wobble to punctuate. It was serious business, and his boyfriend hackles were right up.

Comments

[gotstarpower]

Mercedes had, indeed, planted her hands on her hips as soon as Quinn got into the thick of her untimely rant. It had started as a bit of a frustrated rant about kicking her toe, but then it just escalated to an outright cranky rave over living with males and how dicks sucked, and therefore so did Puck and Blaine. Honestly, the boxes were piled neatly and they knew they would have to live around them for a bit because they had moved without whilst still needing to work and study. She knew Kurt had been planning to help Blaine get the rest of his things unpacked that very day but Blaine had been a mess with his head. Mercedes saw it with her own eyes when Kurt had texted her from upstairs earlier and asked her to bring him an icepack up. He just had to sleep it off and there definitely wasn't going to be any unpacking that day. "You damn right, girlfriend," she cut in with a nod for emphasis. "What y'all playing at finger-pointing at the mess? I've still got boxes I ain't been able to get to and yours were lying 'round just as crazy these past few days. Puck's been working his buttcheeks off on nine nights straight at the cop shop and you wanna stand there and moan about a sore toe? Mmhmm. Bitch, please."

There might had been a sassy head wobble all of her own, and even a sassy finger shake. It was true, Quinn had been on edge the whole time they were moving, but everyone had been, so it was less pronounced. The only time she seems somewhat okay was when Jeremy Smyth had been there to help them carry boxes (at Blaine's request, and at least until he had been swivelling on the chair at the kitchen counter and he, too, copped a tongue-lashing) or when Kurt was in the midst of his OCD thing. She had softened then, knowing if they didn't let Kurt just do his thing, it could set him back to square one on his treatment progress. They knew all along he wouldn't cope if things felt out of place for him. He had to find his own new niche so he could keep a hold of the regime for his eating disorder. But now Quinn's mood was rife, and finally, her two bitchy friends weren't going to be outbitched anymore. Not even close.

[woman_or_a_girl]

There was certainly a part of Quinn that knew without a doubt that she was being a total bitch. It wasn't like she was trying to be, but then she never wanted to be one of those girls who blamed being pregnant for everything ever. I can be a bitch, I'm pregnant! wasn't exactly the fall-back she was going for here. She sighed heavily, looking from Kurt to Mercedes, feeling awful for the whole thing, but then she was on edge again, and very much on her guard. She couldn't just blurt out the truth, could she? Although, on the other hand, she supposed it did kind of have to come out at some point if she chose to keep the baby, considering that she shared this house with four other people who deserved to be considered in the whole process. But she just wasn't ready for that yet. It was more than she wanted to even have to think about herself, much less discuss with anyone else. So instead of telling the truth, which she very well should have been doing, she planted her own hands on her own hips and stared them both down, silently for the time being, and with an almost nervous edge hanging around things that she couldn't quite keep under control.

Once she was sure she'd set her bitch glare pretty well, she turned to Kurt, and started to open her mouth to say something back to him. But then she was looking at him, and despite the no-nonsense bitch tone he took with her, she couldn't help noticing how much healthier he looked than he had before, and she knew that a great deal of that was owing to Blaine. So why the hell couldn't she just be grateful? Because her toe fucking hurt, and she felt sick to her stomach, and she was fucking hungry at the same time, and she was just uncomfortable and pissed off! Everyone was entitled to that, right? It wasn't out of line to be pissed off at people leaving their shit lying around where other people could get hurt, right?! Right. "Well, I'm fucking sorry that I'm such a pain in the ass inconveniencing you this way. Maybe I should've just stayed at the old apartment or gotten a place of my own and it would've made things so much easier for all of you!" Whoooooaaaaa, Quinn... Even she knew that she was going way too far over the passive-aggressive line, and she needed to back the hell on up. But before she got as far as an apology, one that she really did want to give, her words were catching in her throat, and she was giving a panicked look from Mercedes to Kurt. What if she'd really done it now? What if she'd pushed it too far, and now they wouldn't want to live with her? What if nobody wanted her ever? Who would if she managed to make even her fag and her best friend want her to leave?

[justbeingaqueen]

Kurt stiffened at her retort, and although she probably didn't mean it personally, he took it as that. Was that how she had felt dealing with his stuff? Like it would be easier if they weren't living with him? It had nothing to do with being inconvenienced about anything, and everything to do with not wanting to be bitched at for no reason at every turn in their new home they had to share. He didn't even have a response for her immediately. She just earned a cool, judgemental glare in return. His arms also were tightly folded over his chest as he began to already force the walls up around him. Confrontation wasn't his friend, and if she was going to make it personal, he was going to take it personal. "Are you trying to say something?" he snapped at her with a defensive glare. "Maybe you should have stayed there to live on your own, because clearly being anywhere near your friends is such a major annoyance to you that you can't deal with kicking your fucking toe on a box! Sor-ry to make your life such an awful experience, princess, but you know fucking what? Suck it up or get out, because yeah, we're all dealing with enough of a stressful life right now without needing a resident asshole bitching us out for no reason! We all have to live here. It's not Princess Quinn and the commoners daring to breathe the same air as her! And fuck you again for badmouthing my boyfriend when he isn't even here to defend himself!"

He had meant to be quiet, but once she had nudged away at his sensitive spots, it was game on. Deep down, his own nerves were pretty stretched trying to adjust to the new environment and for the first time, sharing his personal space with someone else. On top of that, his treatment was a consideration in everything he did, it was all calculated so he could deal with it, but he was getting better and Blaine was helping him with it. Even when he had been in pain and feeling sick earlier, he still told Mercedes to make sure Kurt had breakfast and explained how to best make what was on the diet sheet that morning. He didn't need Quinn making out like he was nothing but an inconvenience to have around. Without Blaine, who knew what mess Kurt would be in right now.

[gotstarpower]

Kurt hadn't bitched anyone out like this in a very long time, so that alone was sign of his progress after his very terrifying relapse. She could see why this was escalating, though. Whatever bug it was up Quinn's ass, Kurt was taking her bitching personally as a blight on Kurt and his hackles were up to protect his boyfriend. It was adorable on some level, but that didn't take away the fact that Quinn was being an epic pain right now. Kurt was right, they did all need to live together. They had two other people to adjust to sharing with, and that was a lot of bodies and a lot of different personalities under one roof. Quinn couldn't just be bitching them out because she was in a bad mood when everyone was already doing a really good job to adjust to the new situation. Kurt was already hovering slightly in the danger zone with his condition. It might not take much to push him over the edge into another relapse. He had to be comfortable in the new place or it would never work. She just hadn't thought it would be Quinn to rub him the wrong way. Puck or Blaine, sure, that would have made sense because Kurt wasn't used to living with them, but not Quinn. "Is this because of Puck? 'Cause you said you were fine with that. You said you guys didn't have no problems with it, but if you do, you gotta speak up right now 'cause I certainly ain't gonna live with you moaning about every little thing to get in your way either, Miss Thing. Not even close."

She did have to somehow remain the peacekeeper, though. Blaine and Puck were both upstairs sleeping, and neither of them needed to be woken by a screaming match. Kurt's voice was already raising and Mercedes wanted this whole arrangement to work out, because it was the only thing that made sense. The last thing she wanted was Kurt to pull the plug on it all before they even got a week into it all. "You really shoulda told us sooner if this wasn't gonna work for you, girl. If you don't stay, we're all gonna be in a mess on the rent. We can't afford it without all us paying our share. It ain't like it's Lima. It's a beach house in Miami. So, if there's something going on here, you're gonna have to fess up or it's all gonna be one giant pile of crap."

[woman_or_a_girl]

There was no question whatsoever that Quinn had crossed certain lines with Kurt that she really shouldn't have crossed. And even she was bugged by her behavior. She was being awful, just as she had been to Jeremy earlier. She was at the point of being insufferable, and both Kurt and Mercedes were calling her on it. Fucking hell, she had to say something here, because her behavior was totally out of line, and her friends deserved an explanation. But could she really give it to them at this point? Where the hell was she supposed to go with this? Was it really fair to tell them that she was pregnant when Jeremy hadn't told any of his friends or family yet? Especially considering that Kurt was Jeremy's stepbrother's boyfriend now? "Kurt, I'm sorry," she began, putting her hands up in front of her in an expression of surrender. She was well past the level of acceptable, and she knew good and well that it was time to back the fuck up and chill out before she made things any worse than she already had.

But then, Mercedes was speaking up, and the fact was that she was right. Quinn had no choice here but to tell them what was going on. She could go back and forth all she wanted, but the fact was, they had the right to know. She would talk to Jeremy later, let him know that her two best friends knew what was going on. It was the right thing to do, whether she wanted to do it or not. "It's not... It has nothing to do with Puck," she explained quietly, sinking down heavily into one of the easy chairs that was tucked into a corner against the wall. "It's..." How on earth was she supposed to drop this bomb on her friends right now? Didn't they all have enough of their own shit and drama going on for a fucking lifetime? "I... I know I should've said something sooner, but I didn't... I didn't want things to be any worse than they already were, and it's a huge awkward moment, and..." She looked from Kurt to Mercedes, wetting her lips, before looking down at her hands as she tried to gather her thoughts. "'Cedes... Kurt... I'm... I'm pregnant." Once the words were out, she exhaled in a rush, so quickly that she almost got dizzy. "I'm..." she shook her head again before meeting Kurt's eye, then turning to Mercedes. "It's not Puck's. So that part we don't need to worry about. As for who is the father... That's a whole different twisted mess."

[justbeingaqueen]

It was probably she had added the 'Not Puck' disclaimer before elaborating, because Kurt was pretty sure there was no way he could have handled his boyfriend best friend knocking up his fag hag. Especially not when he knew Rachel's feelings and the fact he couldn't believe how fucking thick and stupid Puck actually was over that whole thing. A blind, deaf toe fungus organism could see that situation more clear than Puck could right now, but hopefully Rachel would finally shed those ties and set herself free going to New York and not just lingering here to be trampled all over by a guy who only wanted to keep her around because he had some deluded notion that his friends should live close to him because he wanted them to. If he wasn't going to dig his head out of his ass and be something special for her, then he didn't deserve to have her around. Not when she was dealing with very old, well-buried painful feelings that had her trapped, isolated, and extremely self-deprecating. Kurt knew what it was like to be trapped by ties like that, and although unrequited love wasn't quite like an eating disorder, deep down where it counted, it was the same sort of thing.

When Quinn apologised, all Kurt did was give her a flat, unimpressed glare in return. If she thought she was just going to backpedal on being a bitch and expect him to bow down and cater to the pouting, she could think again. He was pissed off in Blaine's honour and that wasn't going to dilute easily. But even as she continued and there was the big reveal, all Kurt could do was scrunch up his face with an air of uncertainty. "What is this? High school?" he finally replied with a snort, shaking his head. Just the thought of having a screaming baby anywhere near him was giving him a migraine and he pressed the tips of his fingers to his temple in anticipation. "Why am I surrounded by people who seem to think birth control is optional?"

[gotstarpower]

It took Mercedes a few moments to realise Kurt was referencing Rachel here, which was odd in itself. After the epic fallout with them that let to Kurt pretty much peaking in his ED relapse, they had seemed to forge some usual connection of late. No one knew what they spoke about, they did speak. Mercedes thought it was strange, too, that Rachel was supposed to be BFFs with Blaine and Puck, but she hadn't visited their new place nor seemed to be a presence much at all. How did that even work? Then there was the fact Kurt had referenced Rachel leaving for New York at some point, but Blaine seemed oblivious to it. Kurt was in on something and for a moment, Mercedes wondered if she should be jealous. Not that Kurt would ever replace them as his hags, but still. They had to approve of another joining their ranks, right, and she was still pissed Rachel for telling Kurt he needed to be on RuPaul's Drag Race, though Rachel had extensively apologised for that. Now all of a sudden she was being brought up randomly again, and Kurt seemed less than impressed with Quinn's bombshell here. He would either relent on the bitcheness of Quinn's bad mood, or he would hold her to it for awhile yet, news or not.

Mercedes just gaped at Quinn and then put her hand up. "Hold up, girl. How long exactly have you know this and you didn't think it might be something you should tell us? Who's the baby daddy? Obviously it's someone we know if you think it's gonna be a huge mess. More to the point, are you going to keep it? You got Law School laying out ahead of you, girlfriend! How the hell did you even manage to get into a mess like this when you've been all hooked on Puckerman for awhile there? How did you go from that having some other guy's bun in the oven, or are we completely missing a whole lot more here than meets the eye?"

[woman_or_a_girl]

Quinn couldn't exactly argue with Kurt on this. Having sex without birth control might well have been the number one most stupid thing she had ever done in her entire life. But in her defense, she had very much been drunk at the time and had no idea what she was doing. For Christ sake, she'd woken up pretty sure that she'd fucked Sebastian Smyth, and had never questioned it in the moment where the actual sex was happening, so there was her first sign that things were very much amiss. "I know," she murmured. "I know it was stupid, and I never would've done it in ordinary circumstances, but I was wasted... Like, drunk out of my mind. I didn't even know when I woke up that we hadn't used birth control. Or if we did and just screwed up. Either way, it was just strange, and I didn't... I don't know. It was all a huge mistake, and I didn't know what was coming next. I thought it was... I don't know, I kind of just took off from the whole thing and tried to forget about it, but then I started feeling off, and other things started happening... And I ran into him the day I was going to get a pregnancy test. I don't even..." Shit, she needed to get her thoughts together on all of this before she made it any worse than it already was.

"I've only known for a little while. I suspected earlier, but I didn't know, and I was kind of... in denial about the whole thing. I didn't want it to be happening, and I was planning just to get rid of it and be done with the whole thing, but it all happened so fast, and when I ran into the guy in the market, it all kind of came out to him. He's been a sweetheart, really supportive of however I chose to handle it, but I don't know if I can just... get rid of it. I know I have options. And my career and school to think about, but I just haven't made the call yet." She understood her friends' confusion. They had a right to it, especially considering that she had slept with Puck recently, and for a bit there, thought that there was something special between them. It had been special, and very comforting in the midst of what was a very hard time for them both. But it wasn't meant to be, and in the end, they'd both recognized that and moved on from it as friends. "No, it happened... It was before Puck, but after the last time with Mike." She was beginning to think that she kind of sounded like a slut, and that wasn't what she was going for at all. "That day I came home epically hung over and you saw me on your way out to work and teased me about having too much fun, remember?" she prompted Mercedes. But then it was the moment of truth. She had to tell them who the father was. It was only fair. So she swallowed hard and met her friend's eyes. "It was... Jeremy. Jeremy's the father."