"I've got nowhere left to hide, it looks like love has finally found me."

[rockstarwarbler.livejournal.com]

Who: rockstarwarbler, justbeingaqueen, jewhawk and usedtohaveabs (posting order)
What: Double date... and then some.
Where: Anthony's Coal Fired Pizza, Miami Lakes
When: Thursday night
Rating: Leaving it open for now

It was true, Blaine really was like a dog with a bone. Once he decided he was going to try and nudge Puck into Quinn's direction, hopefully without either of them realising, he wasn't going to give up on the idea. And really, a double date had to be fun, right? Blaine always wanted to get a boyfriend so he could double-date with his BFF and patience really wasn't his virtue. Why wait on something like that? For some reason, though, when he suggested it to both Puck and Quinn, neither of them protested. It might have been because he worded it in a way like he was going to surprise Kurt and that both their BFFs should get along, right? Maybe they didn't actually realise he was setting them up on a date? That didn't matter. Blaine could still work with this.

But Kurt had been the one to very reluctant agree. Blaine told him he wanted to take him out for another date, but that it was going to be 'a surprise'. Kurt didn't seem into the notion, and he didn't seem a fan of surprises, but Blaine reassured him with would be fun and he would love it. Though, maybe he missed that mark because now they were all seated at the quaint little table for four in the restaurant waiting for their huge main course to arrive, Kurt was sitting back in his seat and eyeing Puck and Quinn across the table, cool blue eyes sliding back and forth between them before they locked back on Blaine's face wordlessly.

Blaine just grinned and took Kurt's hand on the table, giving it a squeeze. "I love pizza! Do you love pizza? There is nothing better than it, I swear. It smells amazing." Okay, so maybe he was somewhat oblivious to the discomfort Kurt was feeling right now. It was a double-date with their best friends! That just equalled fun in Blaine's mind, and it would be even moreso when they went bowling afterwards. Who didn't like bowling?

Comments

[usedtohaveabs.livejournal.com]

Quinn had been hoping to hell that it wouldn't be worst case scenario, but even though she had no idea what just went down in that bathroom, the look on Blaine's face - his tears - told her everything. And he couldn't get out of there fast enough, with Puck understandably chasing after him. Quinn cursed to herself for getting her hopes up that Kurt might have opened his heart to Blaine a little and she was up out of her own chair and hurrying to the bathrooms, heels clicking on polish floorboards of the restaurant.

It was like going into a hostage negotiation, she knew that, but she had to first see if Kurt was okay because she started going in at him with the big guns to try and rescue his relationship with Blaine. All assuming it had been Kurt who had pulled the plug. As she located the men's room, she realised that maybe Blaine had been the one to end things when he found out Kurt's secret and maybe ended it all himself. Oh hell, if that's how it went down, Kurt could be beyond crashing and burning right now. She wasn't sure he was psychologically strong enough to cope with rejection like that at the moment. She didn't even think twice, and pushed into the men's room, and as soon as she saw Kurt a sobbing mess crumpled on the floor by the sinks, she swooped over to him, hear heart breaking just at the sounds of his crying.

She crouched down beside him and peeled him off the wall to pull him into her arms. She could smell the vomit on him, and the pills all over the floor caught her attention. She didn't need to see the bottle to know what they were. "Kurt, Blaine just left in tears. You have to tell me what's going on, sweetheart. Talk to me. He found out, didn't he? He knows you're sick..."

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

"I don't know. I didn't give him a chance to say anything. I stonewalled him and broke up with him," Kurt sobbed against Quinn's shoulder, feeling too exhausted and weak all of a sudden to protest or fight her off. In the past, he had fought her extensively. He fought everyone, but they kept fighting him back, and at the end of the day, that was why he trusted them to help him when he needed it the most. There was another wracking sob as he tried then to peel out of Quinn's grip. "But it's for the best! He doesn't know me and he's got some sort of fairy tale about me built up in his head! He thinks I'm attractive and I'm not! I'm horrible and I'm gross and I... I... I'm sick I need help," he finally relented in a broken whisper.

He hated these times the worst. Where he tried with everything in him to fight off what the illness was telling him, and it just got so exhausting and nothing made sense anymore. "I-I've lost him, but I have to. It's not fair for him to let him think I'm something that I'm not. I tried to do it, but I can't. I don't know how to be something someone wants when I don't know how to be something I want. I hate myself. I had to hurt him, Quinn! I-It's the only way. I need... need to get out of here. I want to go home."

[usedtohaveabs.livejournal.com]

When Kurt did that flip-flop thing where he recognised he was sick and needed help, but was still battling the voices, Quinn could feel her own head start to hurt a little. At least the window was there. Recognising he needed the help was always the biggest part for him, and was when he usually did take the steps to get back on track again. But he had still just thrown something potentially amazing for him under a bus in the worst possible way, and now he was in here bawling, and Blaine was there somewhere with Puck crying. Why did it have to be like this?

"You should have told him, baby. I'm not going to preach to you. Not at all, let's get you home, but I want you to keep talking to me about this, Kurt. Tell me happened? We'll get a cab, but I want you to talk to me and tell me what's going through your head," she coaxed as she struggled to help him up off the bathroom floor. He was in a mess, and on closer inspection, she could see he had sick on his sleeve and he was sweating. He was also shaky on his feet when she did get him up, and had to wonder when the last meal he actually let himself digest was.

Still, she wrapped his jacket around his shoulders and did a quick clean-up job of his face with some damp towels, even if just to freshen him up a little to get through the restaurant. The foundation he had been wearing to conceal the bruising was gone from the sweat too and you could see the yellowing at his temple and cheek now. He looked miserable, so she just slipped her arm around him and led him out of the restaurant, pausing only to ask the maître d' to call a cab for them. They waited in the foyer and she kept a rhythmic rubbing of his arm to try and soothe him, holding him close. "Are you feeling okay?" she asked him quietly, close to his ear, while they waited. "Physically, I mean."

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

Despite the fact he was sweating, Kurt was shivering now. This whole thing had clearly been just as much a shock for him as it probably had been for Blaine. He had tried to hard to maintain everything, but it had just been too much and he once again fallen flat on his face in life when things were going well for him. "Tired... sick... I think I cut my throat when I..." His eyes just fell closed and he wet his lips with a faint shake of his head. She didn't need him to verbalise what he was referring to, she knew all too well.

But he clung to her, needing that comfort and contact, at least until he could get home and crawl into the safe nest of his bed to let his heart break even more. He wanted a shower to wash away this horrible ick feeling he had all over, and then he wanted to get into his favourite pyjamas, which were an extremely unfashionable pair of well-worn checked flannel ones, and just hide away from everything. He just didn't know how he was going to go to have spent the last few days with cuddles in bed from Blaine to nothing. It was going to hurt beyond belief, and he only just managed to stifle a sob by lower his head down and exhaling shakily.

The cab arrived quickly and they went outside to where it was parked. But it was just as Kurt stepped out onto the sidewalk, Quinn's arm still tucked protectively around him, that the very faint sound of what had to be a sob caught it attention, and his head whipped around to look up the street. There was no missing Blaine sitting on the lower stairs of a building in the distance, hunched over it his face buried near his hands. Kurt stopped at the door of the cab and Blaine looked up as he did, only just catching brief sight of each other before Quinn stepped in front of him to bundle him up into the cab, climbing in after him and pulling the door closed behind her. "I-I really hurt him," he whimpered.

[usedtohaveabs.livejournal.com]

When Kurt and Blaine laid eyes on each other, albeit at a distance, Quinn's heart broke. She gave Kurt a few moments to decide if he was going to go over to Blaine, but when he just baulked and froze, she knew that it wasn't going to happen and the longer she let him stand there, the worse he would get. She needed to get him home so he could take a shower and go to bed. It was the safest place for him to be right now. And while he was showing, she was going to get rid of everything in the kitchen he could purge on and check his bedroom for any stashes. It had gotten to that point, and she hated it.

She cuddled him close once again when they were in the cab and it took off from the curb. "I've got some throat lozenges at home from that horrid flu over Christmas, and I'll make you some honey and lemon tea for after a shower, sweetheart. You know you need to try and get a little of something into your stomach or you'll run into all sorts of issues again. Do you want me to cuddle in bed with you tonight? I know you, you won't sleep easy."

"Kurt, you're hurting yourself, too. I'll call the therapist and try to get you an emergency appointment ASAP. I know you didn't intend to hurt him, but you knew what keeping this from him could lead to. Now that it has, you just need to try and deal with the aftermath. Do you really believe he couldn't cope with this, honey? You don't want to give him a chance to try...?" she asked carefully.

[justbeingaqueen.livejournal.com]

Kurt nodded and wiped at the tears with the back of his wrist. They were just coming thick and fast, especially when she mentioned cuddling in bed. It's what he had been doing with Blaine after he smashed his face on the treadmill. God, why hadn't he just had the balls to tell Blaine what was wrong then? Why did he continuously fuck every good thing up in his life? But it was better this way. Blaine didn't need to deal with the burden of all this. No one really understood it. Kurt didn't even understand it, he just knew he was damaged and Blaine should have someone who wasn't so fucked up. He probably wouldn't sleep at all. The voices would keep telling him he was fat and didn't deserve a boyfriend like Blaine. He knew enough to know it was best he wasn't alone, and he didn't really want to be. When he was left alone like this, he always did more damage.

"No," he whispered hoarsely and then turned his head away to look out the window, sniffling back more tears and curling in on himself as he looked through his bag in his lap for some breath mints. He found the small box and shoved some into his mouth to try and get rid of the horrible taste still lingering there to match the sick feeling inside. "I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to talk about anything. Please just take me home."